Idealism

For over a year I've had to answer the same question about being in Israel: "Why?" The range of my answers has been extensive. From humorous (Here for the hummus) to philosophical (Looking for home) to downright confusing (Music). Now I've finally settled on a simple sentence that seems to satisfy people's curiosity and doesn't lead to many follow up questions. I'm an idealist. Usually when I say that, I'm told that I'll grow out of it or I get a superior smirk in response. So the question is: What's bad about being an idealist?
I haven't really thought of it until recently but for the past few weeks I went through some internal struggles that led me to a need to write this entry. To try and and put my thoughts on paper and organize them just a bit. It's a compilation of memories, movies, books, and inspirations. As you're reading this, remember - I don't really know anything. That being said, let me "philosophize" a little...
Every kid wants to be a hero. Whether it's an astronaut, a doctor, a soldier, a gymnast, a teacher, etc. A hero is different for everybody but a hero always helps others and saves the day. So where does that wish go when we grow up?
Everybody falls in love. Everybody is willing to give up everything for the one person that seems so perfect to them. At least once, everybody opens oneself and turns inside out happily. So where does that love go when things get tough?
It doesn't go away. It's buried deep inside until it's brought up again by something or someone.
Everybody is an idealist. So why do people think that it's something that they need to grow out of? Once in a while they are reminded how good and priceless their ideals are. Whether it's after reading a book, seeing a movie, hearing a song or just stumbling on a special news story. But for a split second they are moved. Once again they want to be that astronaut. Once again they want to fall in love. Once again they want to change the world. And then the world changes them.
People get overwhelmed. Work, school, money, wars, failure, fear, doubt, pain... Life takes over ideals to a point where we don't believe in fairy tales any more. In other words, growing up sucks.
Along the same lines, there is no Zionism in Israel. My friend Anna realized it and felt cheated. That was her reason for coming. While I've never thought of myself as a Zionist, I forgot why I came to Israel as well. Daily rides in a crowded bus, struggles with Hebrew, conflicts with roommates; these are definitely not the reasons. My ideal was to walk these streets confidently and with a purpose. To see beauty where no one else does. To gain strength with every small victory. To get up from every defeat. To love purely. To smile carelessly. To breathe freely.
I am an idealist. And I'm proud of it. I'll remain one no matter how tough it gets. Nobody and nothing will change me. I am done adjusting to the world. Let the world adjust to me.